Soccer Mom. Stay at Home Mom. Busy Mom. Single Mom. Working Mom.
Stressed Mom. Frustrated Mom. Overworked Mom. Under-appreciated Mom. Frazzled Mom.
I’ve been most of these at some point, and many right now.
I try to pause first thing in the morning now. I mean, literally pause. Once I realize that I’m conscious, no longer asleep and definitely not dreaming, I pause. I give God a moment to whisper to me because once my feet hit the carpet, it’s lights, camera, action. There’s outfits to coordinate, lunch boxes to pack, snacks to label, socks to match, hair to comb, teeth to brush, tears to wipe, car seats to buckle, laundry to sort, floors to vacuum, toys to pick up… on and on.
So I pause now, first thing in the morning. Dr. Mike Murdock said to give the Holy Spirit the first seven minutes of every single day. How delightfully simple that seemed to me. I for one feel at times a bit dissatisfied with my prayer and devotion time. Although I’ve always considered my relationship with God to be more fluid than formal, I do realize the need for and respect the presence of a degree of formality in my worship.
While pausing this morning, just lying in bed listening to the whispers of the Spirit, something came to me.
I may not complain a lot outwardly, but inwardly, I complain quite a bit. I stopped believing in that imaginary land called “Fair” a long time ago but every now and then, I have thoughts of it. “It’s not fair that I’m raising my two children virtually alone”. “It’s not fair that their father takes his parenting role in an optional manner while mine is a requirement”. “I don’t have the luxury of waking up and saying, that I don’t feel like doing this today”. I’ve gone to work with bronchitis, and when I wasn’t working with the full blown flu myself, I was home taking care of two sick children who also caught the flu at the same time. I’m the one who has to give my son breathing treatments when he needs them. I’m the one who thinks on down the line and tries to anticipate a disaster.
By now, I’m up and out of bed. I’m standing in the kitchen, packing my childrens’ lunch boxes, still meditating on everything. Then, then thought comes to me, “What if your car’s transmission complained as much as you do?” Huh? Ok God, what do you mean? He said to me, “When you’re driving and approach a hill, you press on the gas and your car’s transmission responds by shifting gears and transferring more power to the engine allowing the truck to move up the incline at the same speed that you were going on the straight-away. What if your transmission complained about working harder than the tires? What would you say?” I do answer God when He speaks, so I said, “I’d tell the transmission that’s what you were built to do! Change gears and get ta haulin!”
And that’s what He said to me.
Change gears. Adjust. Adapt. Shift. Lift. Do what you gotta do.
Stop complaining. This is what you were BUILT to do.
If a joint didn’t flex it would cause pain and there would be no walking going on.
I was BUILT to adapt.
I was BUILT to bear.
I was BUILT to endure.
I was BUILT to adjust.
I was BUILT to empower others.
I was BUILT to bring order to chaos.
I was BUILT to bring comfort, peace and stability to those I love.
I was BUILT to last.
No longer will I look at my children’s father in anger or disgust, thinking that I am somehow being treated unfairly. Yes, my burden is heavy but I was BUILT to carry it.
There are plenty of parents behind bars because they were not built to handle the load that has been placed on me. They took it out on their children and now those innocent little children are no longer alive.
But I was BUILT to handle this and handle it like a good transmission.
SHIFT and LIFT!
I may not be the best mom on the planet but I’m the best one for two children in particular. Nobody can do what I do like I do it because God BUILT me for it!
I’m done wallowing in defeat, frustration, anger and hurt. So WHAT he’s not doing as much as me?
He CAN’T do as much as me.
He’s not BUILT for this.
I was BUILT just for this!
And so are YOU.